Sprinkles on your cappuccino sir? The staff enquire in black and dark green soulless tunics. Makes them look anaemic. Not enough fresh air. Serves to hide the boredom. Nearly. That would be lovely.  Especially the one on the coffee machine. Barista.  Must be one of those foreign names. I'll give her sprinkles. The daily grind. 

 

The cleaner-upper in a hairnet, very fetching .... the dirty plates and cups. Have we all quite finished? Well what does it bloody look like? The retired retiring couple fail to say. Like so much else. I'll just clear this away for you. Yes if you must. E numbered disinfectant and a damp cloth. A half hearted execution. 

 

The manager, quite young, striking, kerchief at her neck, hair in a bun, not yours I hope, ha ha, rather odd cadence, older than her years. Unbelievable red lipstick, eyebrows immaculate, brushed on blusher, how long must that take, hides the black eye. Nearly.

 

The blond emits herself from the till. OMG!! Four Pandora gift bags hung over heavily suntanned and bejewelled arm. She shudders to a window seat and leaves the less than glamorous husband to Apple pay and carry the tray. Him in stripped shirt - horizontal, wrong and sock less trainers. Shorts that aren’t. 

 

The older lady, widowed, who knows?, but wedding ring expensive still on finger. Turquoise cardigan, understated floral skirt and uncategorisable exquisite green coat blend magnificently. Eats precisely dabs mouth with napkin.  Impeccably. Fish and chips. Another measured twist of sea salt. Tea for one. Two sugars. Thank you dear. Human kindness. No milk. 

 

Vicars wife, so I assume, authoritative, or so she thinks, strained expression, the incredulous look, gone are the days, navy and white striped cashmere top, very sea salt. Collar, a matching blue, folded neatly over, nothing out of place, necklace, like a sense of humour hidden. If there is one. 

 

Opposite her, a quite possibly under sufferance friend. Looks could probably kill but her back is to me, so I can't tell. Discussing IT. What you can do with Windows 10? Chuck it out the sodding window. Blue knitted top, denim jacket on the chair back, clashing blue hues. Oh dear. What was she thinking? Perhaps she wasn't. Who will ever know. 

 

Hairnet runs another sortie 

Lipstick hovers left and right 

Blond adjusts to disappointment 

Turquoise gracefully polite 

Sea salt smoulders incandescent 

Suffering friend's fake acquiesce

Sprinkle's seething anger ferments

Take it, it's your M&S. 

 

GMJ October 2016